Saturday, December 10, 2022

"Don't be nice, twice!"

 "What does your husband do? What is his exact designation? What are your qualifications? What kind of contract have you signed? What do your parents do?"

After completing a certain period of time in my new workplace, I am stumped by the amount of intrusive and nosy questions! Since it's just my first week, I can't give much details about it but will just say that it's not a French organisation. The people here are much closer to where I come from. This line of questioning is something I have not been used to in a very long time. If I encountered those who did, I would simply not have the chance to meet them often so it never bothered me much. But unfortunately at the moment, I am facing a ridiculous amount of intrusive questions DAILY, to the point I have to wonder about what strategies to adopt to have a more peaceful mind at the end of the day! lol! It doesn't work to give honest and straightforward answers sometimes. And honestly, I would be so embarassed to pose such questions to anyone, so I wonder at their audacity.

This particular situation reminds me of the French saying:


(credit: Google images )


Translation: One should be nice. But not twice. Otherwise we become nice-nice (bonbon = sweet) and people eat us.

This is the feeling I've had. My truthful answers have been revealing to them and satisfied some curiosity, which I am afraid isn't coming from a healthy place. I let myself be eaten.

I am sure that some people reading my post might wonder "What is the harm in these questions?". For those who think this way, I can assure you that these are considered irrelevant and too-inquisitive to the French brain. To strike good work relationships, one must always be tactful. Sometimes the quality of your communication reveals the kind of person you are. I would have been very happy to have general conversations (and yes that's possible!) instead of being obliged to answer to questions that are actually attempts to find my order in the pecking line. 

If you have tips on how to avoid undesirable questions without offending, please let me know in the comments! Happy weekend to all! :) 


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